Bad Habits from 2014 to Put Behind You January 05 2015

 

 

I was very ready to see 2014 come to a close.  While I greatly enjoyed my time with my family and doing the things I love to do, both of my parents died in 2014.  That brings along many challenges, from feeling bad for not being a more attentive daughter (I lived quite a distance from them), to reconciling those hurts we tend to push down until we have to face them.  

In a positive way, I rang in the new year with my husband and I am now enjoying my resolve to do some things differently, and it's paying off.  

Below are several suggestions for you, feel free to chime in with your comments and thoughts: 

Either speaking too quickly or holding back. Either choice can be damaging and toxic. If you are one to speak before weighing out the value of your words, adopt the 30 minute rule and allow yourself a waiting period. There’s nothing wrong with picking up the phone 30 minutes later and explaining your well thought out feelings. This is also easily applied to emails. Draft it but don’t hit send until you’re sure it’s what you want to say, and can live with the consequences (if there are any).

Avoiding change. Change is a natural part of life. We sometimes fear change because it means we could become uncomfortable, but embrace your adventurous side and remember that that unfamiliar feeling will pass on and you’re find comfort again in your new situation or the new season in your life.

Ruminating or replaying the past. If you had a particularly bad year (or a good one) you may be inclined to replay those moments, for good or ill, until you feel that you’ve exhausted yourself on those matters. Don’t be so hard on yourself. Tony Robbins states that he has made plenty of mistakes, but he doesn’t allow them to bring him down because he derives the lesson from the mistake and therefore it’s no longer something to drag along, but a learning experience. It takes practice, but remind yourself throughout the day to let go of that moment. You’ll find that you’ll have more peace of mind and more energy to focus on doing the right things in your life that help define your confidence.

Ignoring your own needs. Everyone, regardless of how dedicated you are to a selfless lifestyle, has needs. While it may seem superficial, it’s very good for you mentally and emotionally to take care of yourself. Sit down to have a healthy meal instead of working through lunch or dinner, and turn your phone off. Take a hot bath, or get a massage. Even something as simple as taking a walk or putting on your headphones and listening to music.  All of these thoughtful things help your body create endorphins, that feel good chemical in your brain that says “ahhh”.

Setting your boundaries and protecting them. No one else is going to protect them for you. Giving in to someone else’s needs can cause great compromise and leave you feeling resentful. This can range from giving in to gossip, spending too much, drinking too much, or avoiding your personal hobbies and goals. It’s hard to say no, so the best way to present it is in a short answer and don’t over apologize. Serving others is very satisfying, and caring for your family and business, but if it leaves you feeling bad and depleted, give yourself a break.


Do you have some resolutions or suggestions for putting 2014 behind you? Share your comments here!